white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Is Oprah even human
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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