i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
it's great music for shaving your balls
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Randomize
