Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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