so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I'm stoned in an empty parking lot listening to dave matthews while looking for a lighter.... I feel like I sent this 7 years ago.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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