dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Please don't use social media to get back at me.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
