I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
Randomize
