So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
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We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
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Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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