This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize
