I woke up (not at home) to find out I kissed Ryan Caberra, flashed for free gumbys and carried around an inflatable moose named Johnson. Great success.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize