Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
