Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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