I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Randomize
