If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
