it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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