You can't special order awesome
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Randomize
