If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
nutella sex= disaster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
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