Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
