Me. At least after what I've been through.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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