Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
Randomize
