did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
and she was petting her beer can
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
Randomize
