Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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