I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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