And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
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