you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Randomize
