do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
