Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
