my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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