pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
i now understand why vodka
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize