i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
I cut him off because he was changing my thermostat every time he came over
You made the right decision
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