Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I legit just said "vaginal access denied" then told him his password hint was "tequila shots"
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize