If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
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