So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
Randomize
