i don't like sucking hair
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
