i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Randomize