i don't plan on having that self control this summer
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
