what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
