Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize