i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
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