I'm going to have to call in sick tomorrow. After this weekend, there's no way I can handle hearing the accountants talk about double entry without puking.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Can I color on your dick again?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Randomize
