Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
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