Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
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