Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I was so drunk I asked my mom if she had always been my mom or if it was someone else for a while
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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