all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize