I called the bartender Mr. Intoxication last night. He thought it was funny until i threw up and blamed it on him
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize