oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
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