I'm drive I can fine osifer
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
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