Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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