Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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