ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
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