I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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