The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
We got so high we made milksteak
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
